For the fans of the Sitcom: “Yes Minister”

Bureaucrazzzy

The collusion between politicians (P), bureaucrats (B), capitalists (C) and religious leaders (R) is a known fact worldwide and it has mostly proved to be a recipe for disaster. Any scam originating in the country can be attributed to hands in gloves job of political masters and their subservient (debatable though!) bureaucracy. All recent scams which knocked India off its feet be it Chopper Deal, 2G, Coalgate, Tatra, Antrix Devas Deal or CWG, if there is any truth in them, then it has definitely left a bad example of this collusion. And the worst manifestations of P-B-R connivance have been riots and genocide perpetuating all forms of atrocities on the voiceless lowest strata of the society throughout the world. Ramachandra Guha in his book “India after Gandhi” while giving the Prologue narrates five axes of asymmetries running in this ‘Unnatural Nation’ namely Caste, Language, Religion, Class and Gender. I would like to extend his ‘Class’ definition which he restricts only to Capitalist (C) to others namely P-B-R. It is these rich and all powerful P-B-C-R (lets refer it as ‘PoBuCRacy’ hereafter) classes who rule and decide the faith of the humanity. It is this collusion of ‘PoBuCRacy’ classes which is increasing the Gini coefficient, social unrest and keeping social indices low in this country and for that matter in many other countries as well.

          At the same time co-operation and earnest intentions aided by vision in PoBuCRacy class can work wonders and can create a society may be just short of utopian. History is not devoid of such examples where vision of politicians and responsiveness of hardworking bureaucrats have set standards in public administration to reckon with. Works of many religious leaders like Swami Vivekananda, Ramakrishna Paramhansa and Swami Dayanand Saraswati gave a new direction to the society. Though for many CSR (Corporate Social Responsibility) may be another piece of jargon but business houses through CSR and through their long term social contracts are making a positive impact on the society and contributions of Tatas, Infosys, Hindustan Unilever and ITC are noteworthy.

          But this article is not about portraying the serious business of PoBuCRacy. Politicians and bureaucrats have a life too and they can be funny, witty and jokes emanating out of their interactions can set the society ROFL and LOL. Come on give them a break and for once celebrate and explore the hilarious side of these poor chaps who are otherwise at the receiving end for anything and everything. These mortals might be on the face of it intimidating, stone faced, unapproachable and ‘touch-us-not’ types but then can be a source of  entertainment too if we take a pause from censuring them. Had there been no ‘Sardars’, ‘Wives’ and ‘Politicians’ in the society, this earth would have been a sad place to live robbed of its vitality and fun quotient.

                It has been just two weeks in this small Himalayan state of Himachal Pradesh as a budding administrator and this state has already started amusing me with its amazingly vibrant diversity. Achievements in first two weeks have been my engagement (Not purposely planned though!), meeting the CM, Governor, Chief Justice and a fleet of top bureaucrats in the state and last but not the least meeting ‘The People’ and listening to their anecdotes. Art and culture bores me to death if it can’t increase the adrenaline gush in me. So conspicuously my interaction with the people of the state has been in the domains which will be of my interest in near future namely how the administration is run in the state, its various nitty-gritty and of course the relationship patterns between the Political bosses and their efficient (I know it’s debatable!) managers i.e. bureaucrats. And this relationship pattern is no different from the rest of the country and to my surprise it evades its geographical and economic conditions and shares the pan-Indian characteristics. So I was not shocked to get threatening looks showing off superiority from my boss and for not asking me to take a seat in chamber while making a personal appearance. Boss is Boss irrespective of altitude, temperature and humidity of the place. Himachal with roughly 68, 00,000 population and 68 assembly seat, which computes down to an average of 1, 00,000 population for each constituency. So literally every vote counts and thus MLAs have sleeves rolled up all the time and consequently bureaucrats are kept on toes. Margin of error for MLAs is very less and that is evident in 25-30% new faces in assembly each year. This makes the life of civil servants miserable and the only respite they get is the pleasant weather throughout the year to keep their cool which is always a jealousy factor for their counterparts in other states.

                For all those who are big time fans of British sitcom ‘Yes Minister’, I can tell you with conviction and take my words Sir Humphrey Appleby (One who plays the role of Permanent Secretary in the TV sitcom) would have tough time in Shimla from where once the British ruled Indian Subcontinent for 100 odd years. He would have been pulling every hair on his head to circumvent the present day political class of Himachal which is educated, easily approachable and totally grounded (Unlike MP Jim Hacker of the sitcom ‘Yes Minister’). In Himachal if a person wishes to meet the CM in the morning after waking up, he can meet him up and return by evening to his home with a photograph.

          But the story which I am going to narrate is about how a bureaucrat in this part of the world can give run for his money to the fictional character of Sir Humphrey Appleby of ‘Yes minister’. But to appreciate the story it’s important to understand the local worshipping habits of Himachalis. Most of the villages in Himachal have local deities/devtas who are revered and listened to by the entire village in decision making (wait you will know how?). Each devta has a peculiar personality traits and idiosyncrasies. They have a permanent place of stay in village or outside the village but love travelling on occasions in wooden palanquins decorated in a unique style. Many cultural characteristics of the village is influenced by these local devtas. When the procession is taken out at least one male member of the household front of whose house it passes joins the procession. And the final destination of the procession culminates as a place of a fair or Mela. One such famous fair is Kullu Dussehera where 1000’s of local devtas travel all the way to Dhalpur maidan in kullu valley. These local deities have local mortal representatives known as ‘Vazirs’. These Vazirs speak on behalf of these devtas (So these devtas speak as well!). These devtas also fight for superiority over other devtas and issue sermons to that effect through their Vazirs. In some villages people take permission of these devtas even before taking their sick members to hospitals. Villagers take their problems to these devtas and devtas through their Vazirs voice the solutions. And for feast Goats and other animals are sacrificed to these devtas during ceremonies.

          This story was told to me by a subordinate administrative officer and dates back to emergency period and took place in Mandi district of Himachal. Erstwhile Politician Mr Yashpal Kapoor was a close aide of Indira Gandhi, a senior Congress leader and also chairman of National Herald at that time. He planned a visit to a sub-division in Mandi during a very awkward time of year when he could have hardly got a crowd for his rally. The SDM of that sub-division was informed about the same. Yashpal being so close to then Prime Minister Mrs Indira Gandhi that this officer was left with no choice but to make all the arrangements. The first challenge was to gather a crowd for rally. This officer a seasoned one, thought why the local deities can’t help him out of this difficult situation after all why these gods exist if they can’t bail out the needy. These devtas run the justice system of these places and people have blind faith in them. So the Venue for rally was decided and this officer banked on local gods for his salvage. He persuaded the Vazir of the most powerful local devta of Chuhar valley, ‘Dev Hurang Narayan’ to help him out. So ‘Dev Hurang Narayan’ passed a farmaan calling a meeting of other devtas namely ‘Adi Purkh Brahma’, ‘Buda Bingal’ and ‘Sukh Dev Rishi’ at the decided venue. Now on D-day when these local devtas where taken out of their temples to the venue through villages in a procession a large crowd automatically gathered at the venue. So the First task at the hand of Officer-in-Charge was accomplished. So far so good. Now came the next disclosure to him. He was asked to arrange a lunch and the menu specifically demanded mutton. The wise officer again requested the Vazir of ‘Dev Hurang Narayan’ to offer goats as sacrifices to all the devtas present. As this was the only mode to serve mutton in such a gathering of local devtas. Arrangements were made for offering goats to these devtas. But then another custom came in their way. Before making sacrifices water is sprinkled on these animals and if they shudder then they are said to be accepted by the devtas and consequently they are sacrificed. Water was sprinkled by the Vazir on the first goat. The goat didn’t shiver at all. Again our wise officer got in charge. He whispered to the Vazir instead of normal water use hot water. Now when hot water was sprinkled all the goats shivered due to high unbearable temperature. And consequently a good feast was prepared.

          The moral of this story is, nothing is impossible when PoBuCRacy gets down to work. There is no dearth of resources, brains and skills in PoBuCRacy. Need is to work with right intentions with a vision to deliver the best in the interest of the society. It’s high time for PoBuCRacy to change its image and usher into era of inclusive growth taking along even the most vulnerable members of the society. And mind you PoBuCRacy alone is equipped for this transformation by virtue of being at the helm of the affairs.